Flowers for Mom 10

Of Dragonflies, Butterflies and Moths

It is with great hesitancy that I write this post.

I am not promoting superstition, but this has been happening to me since my mom passed away end July last year.

Starting three months after her passing, several type of insects came to me.  A total of 8 encounters in 14 months. Three times moths; three times dragonflies; one time butterfly, one time an unknown insect.

These insects are not only insects I saw around me but insects that seem to be coming to me, maybe to convey messages or at least to say Hi or to say I am with you.

Three months after mom’s passing, I decided to climb Huashan, which is the steepest mountain in China. At the starting point, a golden moth gripped onto the the strap of my backpack and refused to go away despite my wife’s trying to get rid of it.

One night, two weeks ago, I discovered a big moth of around three inches square, stuck onto the outside of my toilet window. I tried to photograph it, but the flashlight has driven it away.

Just two days ago, a light colored moth around one inch square was found within my flat. Mind you, except two windows, all my other windows have mosquito net installed.

I also have three encounters with dragonflies. On two occasions, the dragonflies knocked onto my car windscreen ( one knocked three times) while I stopped at a traffic light. On the other occasion, a pair of dragonflies bumped into my windscreen.

On one occasion, one big blue butterfly flew near me while I was hiking. I said to myself if it is you mom please stay for a moment. . . . . .  which it did.

A couple of months ago, a stick like flying insect ( about 1.5 inches long) came resting on my window pane. Every morning, once got out of bed, I used to brush my teeth while looking out of the window. Here it was this flying insect pinging on my window. It has an extruded dry skin still attached to the underside of its body.

I was, of course intrigued, not only by this insect, but by all the insects that have come to me.

These insects did not just came to me; but they made sure that they are noticeable. Every time because of their appearance, I think of my mom.

I started looking up books about the meaning of these encounters. Some say it could be spirits with a message, a biologist discounted these thoughts. Up to this very moment, I am still baffled.

I know that there is a great divide between the living and those passed away and that we are not supposed to communicate.

My questions are:

Could it be my mom just trying to say Hi?

Why so many insect encounters after mom’s passing?

Dragonflies, with their compound eyes, are known to have excellent eye sight. Maybe they are unable to discern the glass wind screen, but how come I have not experienced this before?

That strange insect with an extruded body seems to suggest to me that it has transformed. Does it carry a special meaning that mom wants to tell?

OK, maybe, I have become too obsessed with seeing insects.

Maybe, as the biologists says, these only remind me of the mom I love and nothing else.

Perhaps, maybe . . . . . . . . . . .